In the dark I thought I heard somebody call

Because the school should get a Komodo Dragon:

"So I went down to California to visit my friend, and I want... 'cause I wasn't getting any of it up here, and I go to visit him, and he lives on fucken Hollywood Boulevard, right? Man, and I get to his apartment so he's got the bottles out and he's, and all of a sudden SCHLUP-LUP-LUP-LUP and this ... tail goes under these crates and (fuck!) I'm like "What the Hell is that, man?!" and it turns out my friend had a fucken eleven-foot-long Komodo Dragon living in his apartment. It was so big... big, you couldn't pick it up, man."

"Aren't those an endangered species?"

"Yeah, but it could break your arm with its tail."

As hunters, these lizards are badass. A Komodo Dragon can run faster than many humans over short distances, and they do not need to finish their prey quickly - their mouths contain over 50 types of toxic bacteria, 7 of which can cause severe blood poisoning. Usefully, however, their bites are not poisonous to other komodo dragons. They can smell carrion at distances of 6 to 7 miles due to Jacobsen's Organ, an olfactory enhancement in the roof of their mouths. Due to competition at mealtimes, Komodo Dragons have developed a tooth structure that is more commonly seen in sharks than lizards, and can consume 80% of their own body weight in one sitting, sometimes in less than half an hour, after which it will not need to eat again for about a week. They are also good swimmers, and can catch fish. Uniquely for a lizard, it is at the top of the food chain in the islands it inhabits.