In the dark I thought I heard somebody call

I'm going to take a moment to rant about 'Alternative Medicine'. I'm talking about 'Bach Flower Remedies'. I'm talking about 'Tiger Penis Soup'. I'm talking about 'Touch Therapy'. I'm talking about 'Applied Kinesiology'.

Bach Flower Remedies: Get a bowl of water. Submerge a flower in the bowl. Let the bowl sit in the sun for a period f time. Take flower out of bowl. Mix water with an equal amount of brandy.
...Now, first of all, people have done chemical analysys. THE FLOWER DOES NOT SHED MOLECULES. So, don't pay lots of money for diluted brandy.

Tiger Penis Soup: It's supposed to be an aphrodisiac. It doesn't work, plus tigers are going extinct.

Touch Therapy: I have a bit of a grudge about this one, because I've SEEN IT NOT WORK. It also makes no sense, because the human body is not wired that way. It's been a bit hard to find information about this, because every webpage I've seen about it does not have even the basics of Touch Therapy, it's just harping $500+ classes. Now, Touch Therapy says that the organs in your body extend their 'aura' to other parts of the body, and that the condition of the organs is rouchly equal to the condition of the other parts. Now, supposedly, these 'other parts' are the /fingers/. So, what if you slam your hand in a door? Does that just mean that your /hand/ wasn't injured, yoyur internal organs were!. Not only is the body not wired like this, Touch Therapy also seem to be devoid of basic logic (If A then B, but if B != A)

...I was also going to rant about 'Applied Kinesiology', but...not right now.

On the plus side, Acupuncture and Shiatsu and some other stuff /has/ been proven to work. so.